Transitions American Style

I can hardly believe that it is almost time to return to Paris for the last time as "ex-pats".  It has been a strange passage of time during this extended home visit. For the most part, I have been a guest in my own home.  My niece and her husband, who graciously agreed to stay in the house while we were abroad have infused themselves happily into our house...this is a good thing...we wanted them to be at home here.  These past few weeks have found us engaged in a strange dance around the living spaces...his kitchen/her kitchen...the passing of the remote...oh no, its okay, we can watch this.  Did you feed the cat...cats...dog?  I'll mow the lawn...okay, well you can do it since you have a system.  We are managing thus far without stepping on toes but it is an awkward dance and the steps change every day.

It is quite strange, I have no real sense of time.  I am often surprised that the day has come and gone...and even more so that nearly a month has come and gone.  The biggest clue about time has been my hair...I am in desperate need of a haircut.  I am lookng forward to my rendez-vous at the end of next week, but I am sad it will be my last "coiffure".  Ironically, the day we leave Paris will be exactly one year to the day that we found our apartment on rue des ecoles.  Funny.

I have been peaceful in Groton.  I have rested.  I must say that there is nothing like a good night's sleep which has been ushered in gently by cool breezes blowing in opened windows.  Nightime, as dark as a pocket, quiets the mind.  And the soft country noises are one of the most beautiful lullabies of my lifetime.

I have been driving my new car...a blessing and a curse.  Living in the country means driving for necessity.  I walk for pleasure, but the weather as of late has not been very condusive for the most part. I was a bit spoiled in Paris.  Everything I needed was in walking distance.  Monoprix, the grocery store was down the block and across the street.  The boulangerie (bakery) was a half a block up the street in the other direction...fresh bread every day!  Just a half a block further was my florist...yep, I had a florist whom I visited 2 or 3 times a month for fresh flowers.  Reilly and I walked four or five times a day for her needs and my exercise.  Walking saved me in Paris.  I am going to have to figure out a comparatively vigourous and beneficial way to walk back here at home.  My waistband is telling me subtly that I am becoming American again...French women aren't fat (wink, wink).

I am in love with the subtle autumnal changes.Nowhere on earth is there more beauty than right here and right now.  Saturday, I stood on the front stoop and raised my face to the sun as it dappled through the trees toward me.  I enjoyed its warmth and I thought I could feel the colors of the trees on my skin.  I stood there like that for a long time.  I was truly happy.

I have a week to go before returning to Paris.  We have friends coming for a last visit.  I am glad they will be joining us even though the remainder of our time will be a bit frantic.  Showing Paris to Barbara and Joe will help me say good-bye to my home away from home.  We'll go to our favorite restaurants and cafes.  We'll walk along the river or through the gardens.  I plan on taking tons of pictures; not of the touristy things, but of the people, places and objects that became familiar.  From the gargoyle the greeted me every day outside my living room window to the walrus mustachioed waiter at the Cafe Sorbonne...I want these pictures for my home in Groton as a reminder of where I was and also of who I was for the past year.

I have been warned that it is not easy to come back to the US after an extended period of time.  Phase One of Operation Homecoming has definitely proved this to be true.  I am hoping that once back into a routine and with the holidays to look forward to, I will regain my sense of place and time.  Until then, I will enjoy this visit and in 24 days I will leave Paris again, but I will never let go.  It is cliche yet true, I will always have Paris.